You might as well ask the leopard to shed its spots or the zebra its stripes! That’s exactly what I first thought when I decided to give vegetarianism a flimsy chance. Well, in normal circumstances, I’d never ever have dreamt about taking such a drastic step. But, considering the fact that I’d left normalcy a zillion light years behind, I faced it with surprising equanimity.Since this is a confession, I must reveal that I’m an absolutely ardent non-vegetarian (that would explain the title). Shocking, isn’t it? And now, the next logical question would be an astounded why? Well, it’s not just the plight of the poor animals who sacrifice their lives for the noble cause of feeding mankind. I’m a firm believer of the ‘circle of life’ theory. Like for instance, I believe that meat adds life to the meal (an oxymoron, I agree) and completely relish the leg of lamb or even chicken and the mere mention of fish simply makes me to weak in the knees. But, I digress. What I’m trying to theoretically say is that I might be reborn as a bright green sprig of delicious grass and an enterprising lamb would want to chew my head off (ouch)! Ah! The sweet taste of revenge, for the lamb at least and not really an exciting prospect for my grassy avatar! Got the drift?
Returning to my vegan intentions, I decided to go about it in a very orderly manner. Fired by enthusiasm and never the one to take half measures, I decided that such a monstrous task cannot be undertaken all alone. So, I went about in search of a comrade, a partner who would fuel my determination to steer clear of meaty temptations. Coincidentally, my BFF (Best Female Friend, in case you’re baffled) returned from Delhi – a vegan by tradition but after having succumbed to the magical powers of butter chicken so freely available on the capital streets, she was eager put an end to the non-vegan mania before it morphed into an obsession. In her, I found an ally who would toil it out with me. And, her vast experience in an enterprise of a similar sort would obviously be an added advantage.
My BFF devotedly announced that a venture of such large dimensions would require divine support. So, we implored lady luck to smile in our favour and decided on a “good” time to start our new mission. 14th of January, 2010 was randomly picked and we’d set our minds on going meatless since that day on. Hailing from a vegan family, BFF was quite used to this but for me; it was a mammoth task especially when there’s meat being cooked on a daily basis. And, my mother’s culinary skills are simply wizard and she’s the true Moghul of meat (gastronomically speaking)! Difficult times lay ahead but I was mentally prepared to meet them!
The next step was to announce my noble intentions to the world. With a million questioning glances and after a couple of boasts, I’d have to keep up to my decision – at least to save my pride. Nothing succeeds like the fear of failure. So, I chose two candidates for this highly esteemed designation – my colleague and another friend (positively carnivorous themselves) who I’d be in touch with daily. Their reactions ranged from astonishment to anguish to pure perplexity. I must admit, their bewildered expressions were totally priceless.
Finally, the day dawned brightly sunny and nice – it happened to be a holiday! Rotten luck! With maternal instincts rising to a record high on such occasions, the best way to display love is by dishing out delicious food. And, my mother did just that! Devious thoughts flitted across like a million butterflies every time I looked at that delectably curry sitting pretty on the dining table. Why couldn’t I start tomorrow? Do I really have to go vegan? But, the principal reason why I’d embarked on such a mission flashed across the retina of my mind. I chose to go vegan out of my own personal whim (however foolish that may sound) and more importantly, it gave me a chance to understand how it feels like to give up (voluntary, I emphasize) an integral part of your life to yet another central element. I guess that did the trick – I felt incredibly happy at having added an ounce of discipline to my usually chaotic lifestyle.
No, it still wasn’t a lark. The first day was the most difficult and as the day progressed, withdrawal symptoms began to raise their ugly heads. I nearly ended up with a mighty nasty headache! Putting it as an intense test of patience would be an understatement – it shook my steely cores and turned it into shaky jelly. I even thought I’d stick to this for ten days and later see where the winds of destiny (aided by sails of human fortitude) take my humble plans.
On a closer inspection, you would realize that it’s hardly been two days since I’d taken the vegan plunge. As I write this, day three looms large and at times like these, the grotesque figures of the veggies dance before my eyes and my will power is at its weakest, ready to give in to temptation. But, ours is just to try and not to reason why. Mind you, I still consider egg to be vegetarian. I’m contemplating on adding fish to that list! Now, that’s some food for thought, isn’t it?
